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'Murtaugh' - Season 4, Episode 19

Barney tries to complete a "I'm to old for this stuff"" list Ted made in just one day. Meanwhile, Marshall's competitive side comes out when he coaches Lily's Kindergarten basketball team.

Air Date: March 30th 2009.

Ted: You know, Barney, last night I went to bed at eight o'clock because it was on the list. And I couldn't sleep, because well, it was eight o'clock. So I decided to watch Lethal Weapon. And then when I still couldn't sleep, I watched Lethal Weapon 2. And then 3. And then, halfway through Lethal Weapon 4, it's when it occurred to me. Murtaugh kept saying "I'm too old for this stuff" but every time he'd say it, he'd turn around, make a movie, and do more stuff. I guess what I'm saying is, screw being old. Let's go TP laser tag!
Barney: Yeah! And then the hospital.

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Ted: What happened to you?
Barney: Oh, I had a blow-out-my-knee-and-it-hurts-like-hell incident.
Ted: How'd you blow out your knee?
Barney: We helped someone move out of a six-floor walkup in exchange for pizza and beer!
Robin: Or we helped someone rob a six-floor walkup. They were in a big hurry and left all the pictures behind.
Barney: Whatevs. It counts.

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Robin: We have our own list.
Ted: What?
Robin: Do each of the things on this list and then tell me you still want to be an old man.
Ted: Remove "colonoscopy" and "sex with an old lady" and this is a cakewalk.

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Barney: You cannot believe what happened to me at laser tag today.
Ted: Everyone freaked out because a grown man was scaring their children?

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Lily: At tomorrow's game, if you're anything less than a teddybear stuffed with cotton-candy and rainbows, I will silent-treatment your ass into the ground. You will think the time I found your Internet search history was a picnic.

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