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Little Minnesota

'Little Minnesota' - Season 4, Episode 11

Marshall takes Robin to a Minnesota-themed bar, while Ted tries to keep Barney away from his visiting sister.

Air Date: December 15th 2008.

Heather: I moved into your old room. Did you know you can see straight into Mrs. Gatwall's bedroom across the street?
Ted: Oh, yes. I am aware of that. How's she looking?
Heather: Ted, she's sixty-two.
Ted: Answer the question.
Heather: Surprisingly perky.

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2

Ted: Here's the back of Heather's baseball card. It took her six years to graduate from three different colleges, during which time she wrecked two cars, got married for five days, and lived in a tree for nine weeks only to realize no one had any intention of cutting it down.

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3

Ted: (On the phone) Heather, where's my couch and my TV?
Heather: I sold them for Nine Inch Nails tickets!
Ted: The couch alone cost two grand.
Heather: Well, last minute plane tickets are expensive.
Ted: Where are you?
Heather: I don't know, somewhere in Spain. Oh, slow song, gotta go.

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3

Barney: I can't believe you've been hiding your sister from me all these years.
Ted: Can you blame me? You're like Weird Al Yankovic, if he only wrote songs about banging my sister.

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3

Robin: (Reading plaque on bar shelf) "I'm drinking till I forget the 1999 NFC Championship"?
Marshall: That game. The Vikings were two minutes away from going to the Super Bowl, when our kicker, who hadn't missed all year, shanked a field goal, and we lost in overtime. (Slams fist on table) Damn!

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4

Robin: I'm proud to be Canadian. We may not have a fancy NFL team, or Prince, but we invented Trivial Pursuit—you're welcome, Earth. Plus, in Canada, you can go to an all-nude strip club and order alcohol. That's right. From Moose Jaw to the Bay of Fundy, you can suck down a 20-ounce pilsner while watching some coal miner's daughter strip down to her pelt. Jealous?

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4.3

Barney: (Singing to the tune of "The Dreidel Song")
Ted has a little sister, gets hotter every day,
And if I ever meet her, with her boobies I will play

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4

Barney: (Singing to the tune of "We Wish You A Merry Christmas")
I wish I could see her naked,
I wish I could see her naked,
I wish I could see her naked,
and down on all fours.

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4

Barney: (Singing too the tune of "Jingle Bells") Pulling down her pants, yanking off my own
Underneath the mistletoe, I'll make your sister moan!
Oh, Heather's hot, Heather's hot, we'll go all the way…

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4.6

Barney: Why, hello, I've been waiting for you.
Ted: Wait a second, that's not our chair. Did you bring that chair yourself?
Barney: I needed one that swivels

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3

Ted: There aren't any black people in Minnesota?
Marshall: Not if Prince is on tour.

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3