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I Heart NJ

'I Heart NJ' - Season 4, Episode 3

When Stella's babysitter cancels, a night out with the gang turns into a night in at Stella's house in New Jersey. Meanwhile, Robin quits her job after mistakenly thinking she got another job.

Air Date: October 6th 2008.

Marshall: (watching Robin's speech) Why does she sound like an idiot? Is she having a stroke?
Ted: Yeah, a stroke of genius. Her speech is really good.
Robin: With one eye on the horizon, one eye on the truth, and one eye on all of you.
Lily: You wrote it for her, didn't you?
Ted: It's a modified version of the speech I gave when I had to leave the swim team due to a chronic inner ear situation.
Marshall: I thought you were the towel boy.
Ted: It's part of the team!

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3

Marshall: Maybe New Jersey's not that bad. Stella has a lawn, you could get a riding lawn mower! They sell 'em over there, I saw one with a cup holder! I saw a recliner with a built-in cup holder! I even saw a hammock with a cup holder! You move to New Jersey, you never have to hold a cup again!
Ted: I don't think I have as big a problem with holding cups as you do.

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4.2

Lily: Look, Stella, I understand that coming from New Jersey you don't picture yourself loving New York. But trust me, Marshall didn't expect to and now he wouldn't think of living anywhere else.
Marshall: I hate New York! I'm sorry, but it's true! Today I was walking around PriceCo. Have you ever been there? It's huge! All the stores in New York are so cramped. Every time I turn, I knock something over. I'm like some huge monster who came out of the ocean to destroy bodegas!

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3.5

Stella: People are nice in New Jersey. It's the kind of place where you know your neighbors.
Ted: I know my neighbors!
Stella: Really? Like who?
Ted: Right across the hall I got Clacks...pa...ma.
Stella: Clackspama?
Lily: His name is Paxton.
Ted: Love that dude!

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2.8

Lily: Ted, if you murder me and bury me in New Jersey, I'll haunt you forever.
Ted: But if I murder you and bury somewhere else?
Lily: Hey, I'll leave you alone. I'm sure you had your reasons.

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4

Lily: You hated that job.
Robin: It wasn't that bad.
Lily: What did they make you call Tropical Storm Hector when they said it was raining "cats and dogs?"
Robin: A furricane.
Marshall: Hey, Ted, "Rock Me Like a Furricane".

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4