'Where Were We?' - Season 2, Episode 1
Marshall is understandably depressed after his break-up with Lily, even more so when he traces her to a New York City hotel.
Air Date: September 18th 2006.
Marshall: Um, you know, Ted is kind of against guns.
Robin: (Pointing a gun at Marshall) And that's why Ted's never gonna find out about this. Whoa! That sounded kind of scary with me holding a gun, didn't it? No, I meant 'please don't tell Ted.'
Marshall: Well I called her! And get this, she changed her number. What like I'm going to stalk her or something, like she's so special. Like she's the only Lily Aldrin out there. Cause there are four others out there in the San Francisco area alone. And they all seem a lot better then her, based on the brief conversations that I had with them.
Robin: Hey! So, did you hear the big news? (Referring to her and Ted getting together)
Ted: You mean how Lily and Marshall broke up and Lily's gone and nothing else remotely important happened last night? Yeah, I think he knows.
Barney: Do you know why you're not over Lily yet? It's 'cause you can still picture her naked. You can't get over a woman until you can no longer picture her boobs. It's a scientific fact. The average male brain can only store a finite number of boob images, or BPEGs. And your hard drive's filled to the capacity with Lily's.
Ted: They were together nine years! It's only been a month and a half, he just needs to go in his own pace.
Robin: He slept on our floor last night Ted!
Ted: He watched a scary movie!
Barney: When I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead. True story.
Barney: So he stays home all the time not getting laid? No, see, that's what you do when you have a fiancée. He should be out here celebrating! He's free! He got that red-headed tumor removed.
Ted: You should write and illustrate children's books.
Robin: My dad taught me to shoot when I was a kid. Whenever I'm feeling lonely or depressed I come here and it reminds me that... guns are fun!
Barney: I have dreamed about this day boys and it’s going to be legendary. Together we will own this city. Any time a girl wants to get back at her ex-boyfriend, we’ll be there. Any time a girl wants to solve her father issues through promiscuity and binge drinking, we will be there. Any time a bachelorette party drives through the city in a limo sticking their heads up the sun roof shouting “What's up New York?” we will be what is “up New York!”
Barney: Aw man, you two did it didn't you?